Doktor!
by paradoxal pervert
Summary: Vexen didn’t think he’d ever end up working as a tech again; but then, the mission called for it. And what better did Vexen have to do other than serve... More spawn of the kink meme, Vexen/Hojo. Contains guro, non-con and vivisection.


This mission was a pain, Vexen didn't think he'd ever end up working as a tech again; but then, the mission called for it. And what better did Vexen have to do other than serve... plenty of things of course, but who _ever_ realised that. It wasn't as if he was just sitting in his laboratories twiddling his thumbs. There were so many better things he could have been doing.

On the other hand this mission hadn't been a complete loss.  
This world did have some very _interesting_ scientific faculties; shame he was stuck pretending to be a lab assistant; he would have rather enjoyed investigating further.

Work before leisure unfortunately, and given the boss; he wouldn't be getting any of the later any time soon. There were benches to sterilise, beakers to clean, and chemicals to put away –fuck, why couldn't he have any assistants to do these things for him back home.

As Vexen was wiping bleach across the bench he was caught completely off guard when someone yanked his head back by his carefully tied back hair and put a piece of metal to his neck.

"What do you think you're playing at?"

The mysterious person was easily identified by voice; it was one of the targets and the man he was pretending to work for, Professor Hojo.

"What are you talking about?" Faking a distressed voice, Vexen attempted playing innocent. Tricky but usually enough to convince most people.

"Did you really think I wouldn't notice that an assitant was suddenly competent?" Unfortunately it seemed Hojo wasn't most people and tightened his grip on Vexen's ponytail.

"Do you really have such little faith in the abilities of your staff?" Next he attempted planting doubt in the assumptions. Vexen had heard the man was smart but he also heard his interpersonal dealings were poor enough that he should have gone unnoticed.

"I have an accurate enough perception of them to know you are not one of them." The piece of metal was quickly revealed to be a scalpel as it pressed against Vexen's skin. "Now answer the question: 'What are you playing at boy?'"

Vexen almost laughed, it'd been a long time since he'd talked to someone old enough to call him 'boy'. Never mind all that however, the man was aware that he was not a staff member and obviously not exactly easily convinced.

The prospect of a slit throat was also something Vexen would rather not.

Vexen dropped the temperature of his body and the air, it made the Hojo's hands burn his skin but at the same time he wasn't the one who just lost skin to the quick freeze.

Hojo jerked away partially from surprise, partially from the sudden temperature change. The ice burn had taken some of his skin, not much but the reaction had definitely been enough for the tall blond man to get free.

Unfortunately Vexen hadn't made the attack completely unscathed; the scalpel had still taken a piece of his neck. It was nowhere near fatal, but it was bleeding a bit. At least until the abnormal temperature stifled the flow, hardening it into a solid cap of ice.

"An interesting trick; surgically imbedded materia?" The practice was familiar to Hojo, but the technique had never exactly been perfected –often it killed the host or drained their energy significantly enough that they may as well have been. It seemed curious that there might have been a successful procedure that he hadn't performed himself that he didn't hear about.

"Natural elemental affinity," Vexen had become fairly decently versed in this world science in the time he had been working, it was interestingly not too far remove from that of Radiant Garden aside from the mako. It wasn't too difficult to understand what was meant or respond in the terms appropriate for this world's science, nor was preparing for a fight should it come to that.

"So you are suggesting you were born with it?" Hojo raised a brow, understandably sceptical of something bordering on the superstitious nonsense frequently directed at young materia specialists. Yes, some people were better at certain elements but never actual naturally occurring ability or capacity to absorb an elemental attack without the assistance of materia.

"You could say that." So much as Vexen was born anyway.

"I have to ask, what are you?" Presuming it wasn't a very excellent hoax, the blond man being human seemed unlikely; Cetra, possibly.

"Nobody," Vexen spoke in a deadpan voice, nothing quite like the truth  
"I really should take you apart and find out." Nothing better than taking something apart to find out how it works.

"I really should take you apart and find out if I can get what I came for without all this bull shit." Nothing quite like a job well done either.

"And what did you come here for that you would need to take me apart."

"Your heart,"

"I apologise, I'm not interested in men." Hojo's sarcasm was hardly subtle, and the way he had started pacing was portraying his irritation.

"Neither am I but this has nothing to do with /that/." Why did they always have to assume that, now really? The sarcasm was duly noted, but the jokes about taking someone's heart were getting old.

Deciding to break the chain of pacing and banter, Vexen made the first move; he was almost surprised that the older man wasn't fazed by his pulling a shield out of thin air. Usually the more science orientated worlds are more shocked by that, on the other side this was a world whose magic system was based on shiny rocks.

Naturally Hojo's capacity to counter was unaffected. Pulling a gun from the breast of his coat, he fired three shots –the first two hit the shield but the third managed a solid hit on the nobody's torso.

Vexen reflexively smack Hojo to the side with his shield. Giving himself to to cover the wound in ice, before walking to the stunned older man. Vexen wasn't particularly strong physically, but, if the man's profile was to be believed, Hojo had at least 30 years on Vexen. The old man had hardly taken care of himself particularly well; Vexen was a little reminded of himself, he certainly wouldn't acknowledge it though.

Vexen pulled the black haired man up by his collar. Through a great deal of effort, Vexen dragged Hojo to the nearest specimen table; the obviously underweight man was heavier than he looked.

The specimen tables were perfect for this, the heavy duty straps and the easy to clean surface.

Hojo was already stirring by the time Vexen had managed to get him on to the table, but efficiency had the man in straps before there was a real chance to struggle and a handful of cotton in the mouth kept noise level down.

After check the straps were sufficiently secure, Vexen left the table to find the necessary tools.  
He prepared two trays, the first he needed to remove the bullet, the second... well, work before play.

Do-it-yourself bullet removal was stupid, painful and took forever... and that was if you were experienced; by the time the necessary waste of time was finished Hojo was completely conscious and aware.

There wasn't much chance in him breaking the bonds, but making neat cuts on a alive and struggling thing was nigh impossible. Nothing a quick sedative couldn't fix of course, but it was another annoying hassle between Vexen and being reunited with his laboratory. Not a great place to be for a person either, especially now Vexen felt like cheating.

Vexen was _supposed_ to take a manipulative approach (hardly feasible at this juncture); Xigbar and Xaldin had their full-pelt-charge-in-blow-shit-up approach, did it really have to be so difficult as to have Vexen do this his own way? Of course not, but that would be requesting Xemnas to use common sense.

Never mind all that, now it was time to get down to business –and what a wonderful business it was.  
Just a quick jab in the neck and the man was still –aware, but may as well have been paralysed. Such a shame it would reduce most of the pain.

"Now let's get a look at that heart," the nobody couldn't resist the playful tone slipping into his voice as he picked up the first scalpel for that all important first cut. Before he put it back down to push clothing out of the way, hygiene wasn't all that important for a procedure that the patient wouldn't live through, but it was heavily ingrained behaviour. The incision site needed to be sterile before the cut was made.

With the dark skin coloured with the disinfecting agent the initial cut was dragged collar bone to pubis.  
Vexen could have used a better cut more suited to heart surgery but the autopsy cuts were hard to resist. Though he stated he lack interest in men, it hardly affected his 'alternative' interests.

Cutting through the muscle, fat and skin of the body without completely ruining it was a skill. Not like those wannabe butchers... would cut their victims up but completely ruin the flesh and claim themselves artists.... This on the other hand, was real art –neat symmetrical cuts; the skin neatly sliced rather than torn; all so much more interesting and all that much more satisfying to accomplish.

With the organs neatly bared to the air and Hojo in the early stages of shock it seemed worth considering taking his time.  
Though he had no interest in men, it wasn't stated outright he had to acknowledge his victim as a man –out of sight out of mind as it were.

It was far from rocket science to find suitable lubrication. All the stories you hear of idiots using anything from SH2O4 to super glue... was it all really so hard to work out that you needed to be a trained professional to know what would and wouldn't work?  
Nor was their much effort to expose the rear of the restrained scientist while ignoring the parts of disinterest.

Never minding the resilience of living flesh, it was hardly as if he was trying to preserve the man's condition. The lubrication was a matter of personal comfort, if the was any intention for Hojo to live through this... well he would be sore in the morning.

The older man wasn't as tight as the girls he would play with, but he could pretend and even failing that, it was still pleasurable enough to ignore his distaste for men.

This wasn't a mess he would have to clean up after, he didn't need to preserve the condition of the flesh –in all honesty he could truly go wild as long as he got the job done. And there was no reason he couldn't get that done; multitasking was a delectable skill –quite a shame so many men failed at it.

Though still quite incapacitated, Hojo's hips jerked reflexively with the roll of Vexen's hips. Soft organs jiggled along with the motions rather pleasingly... at least until the younger scientist pulled the small intestines from there nesting place, letting them drop on the bench and the floor. He found himself oddly fascinated by the way the entrails spread –he seen the sight several times but it always seemed fascinating. It was so much more interesting to look at than watching the organs fall into a bucket or a disposal tray.

By now Hojo was quite obviously out, he could stay living like this for a decent while.

Considerably less careful now, Vexen slipped his hand into the chest cavity, rather viciously ripping a lung to get his hand on the physical heart.  
The physical heart itself was just another organ, but it provided an excellent path to the heart he needed to access. With his hand on the heart, he forced a healthy dose of darkness directly into the metaphysical heart. Give it that straw to break the camel's back.

The body under him started jerking violently; the restraints managed the movement well enough that it was nothing worth worrying about.  
It meant the work had been successful, but it was difficult to care about that when a dying body was twitching, writhing and tightening around him.

The body would die, he would get off, and the newborn nobody could be picked up in a week.

...Why couldn't all missions be this interesting?

* * *

A/N: Okay, this one, this one is in serious need of editing.  
I plan to get around to fixing it eventually... in the mean time, I'm sorry about this one -not much point pretending I didn't write it (besides the part where everyone knew I wrote it.)  
Copped out on the ending due to already being ashamed of it and a side of giving up, and yes, I was reference 'Dead Flowers'.


End file.
